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Coping with Your Teenager’s Mood Swings

Posted by | May 26, 2009 .

By Aurelia Williams, author of Understanding Your Teen

Amoz posing for his big sister's graduation.

Amoz posing for his big sister's graduation.

If you are the parent of a teenager, you are familiar with mood swings. One minute, your teen is happy and loving, the next they are sullen or angry. These mood swings can happen fast and can seem to come out of nowhere and it’s one of the reasons I created my Understanding Your Teen Guide.

You may find yourself wondering what you did or said to cause this shift in your teen’s mood. The truth is, you probably didn’t do anything wrong at all. Your teen’s mood swings are normal, and there is not much that can be done to stop it.

Your teen is slowly becoming an adult and they are developing the skills the need to handle the pressures of the adult world, but this process takes time. They may have a school project due, have chores around the house to complete, and then they get into an argument with their best friend.

Some of these things may seem silly or trivial, as you have work to do and a lot more housework on top of that. Try to remember that your teen’s brain is still growing and they may simply not have the ability to handle all of those pressures and keep a smile on their face at all times.

While you may not be able to end your teen’s mood swings all together, you can use these techniques to help both you and your teen learn to cope:

· Encourage your teen to talk to you when they feel upset or overwhelmed. Let them know that you are there for them, and that you have experienced those same feelings from time to time.
· If your teen doesn’t want to talk, encourage them to express their feelings in a creative way, such as painting, drawing, or writing. Let them know that they can keep this private, that they do not need to show anyone. Once they get their frustrations out, they will feel a lot better and will be able to move on.
· Try not to react to your teen’s mood swings. Sometimes, they say things just to get a reaction. If you ignore the bait, they may change their attitude.
· If you and your teen do get into an argument, diffuse the situation by getting up and taking a break. When both you and your child are calmed down, you can finish discussing the issue.

At times, it can seem like your teen is from a foreign country. They have different behavior and customs and sometimes, and sometimes it can seem as though they are speaking a different language.

Even though there are difficult times, try to enjoy this period of your child’s life as much as possible, because these years will go by very fast.

Next Steps
1. To gain a little more patience and whole lot more understanding of your teen, pick up Aurelia’s Real Life Guidance to Understanding Your Teen – it’s a lifesaver for so many parents.

2. If you’re gearing up for another summer with your teen and want to dread trying to keep them occupied, happy and out of trouble, check out School’s Out for plenty of expert resources to make it a great summer.

Also check out the suggested herbal supplements for anxiety and depression:
http://www.squidoo.com/healing_anxiety

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7 Comments so far
  1. Demetris June 8, 2009 11:34 p06

    I am currently taking medication for anxiety… I would very much like to find a more natural way to combat the disorder…. For I feel the medication is affecting me negatively in other ways…

  2. Marguerite June 8, 2009 11:34 p06

    Yes, you can get on a natural program for anxiety. I would start with a good liver cleanse. The liver is called the organ of emotions. Contact me for a consultant and I can put together a program for you. Also, checkout this link:
    http://www.squidoo.com/healing_anxiety

  3. Tom Poje April 3, 2010 11:34 p04

    Here is my situation– I have two teenage boys that live w/ me. Divorced after 18 years in 2007. Mother still in picture but does not take much responsibility in the rearing of the boys. The older one now 17 is not doing well in school, much disrespect for myself, mother, and school adminstration. Has been kicked out of school several times over the last two years. I need suggestions on discipline and coping w disruptive behavior and home life with him. HELP P.S. I realize this is not a quick fix !

  4. Marguerite April 3, 2010 11:34 p04

    My advice is to connect with Aurelia Williams, Life Coach who specializes in working with teens. I have recommended her to other parents and they were pleased.
    Click on the banner below, to the right that says “coping with teen depression and anger” and you can contact her through that link. Best wishes!

  5. Aurelia Williams April 3, 2010 11:34 p04

    Hi Tom. I definately recommend the links and banner suggestion that Maruerite suggested to you and and also the links in her original post. There are many reasons for Teens to ack out and rebel against things and while you understand there isn’t a quick fix, the 1st place to start is with your son and just opening the lines of communication with him. If you can find out what us under your teens anger you can then begin to uncover the layers. Feel free to visit my site for more information on this. But 1st and foremost is to get your teen talking. If he isn’t going to open up to you, perhaps another family member, school counselor, church member, counselor…etc.

    Good luck!

  6. Leah Oviedo May 13, 2010 11:34 p05

    Great article Marguerite! Communication can solve a lot of problems.

    I was a very moody teenager and communicating helped ease a lot of tension around my home. My mom didn’t want to give me medication so I took St. Johns Wort in some water each morning. I could really see a difference in my mood when I was too lazy to take it. 🙂

  7. Marguerite May 13, 2010 11:34 p05

    Wow Leah, thanks for that wonderful testimony. I hope it motivates more people to seek herbal alternatives for mood swings with their teens.

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